I do not know the secret of a good conversation but I know one when I see one. It is much easier to identify a bad conversation.
What do I mean by good vs bad? It mostly has to do with the subject matter and the degree to which the listeners at the time actually want to listen or will extract helpful information from listening. A conversation with nobody listening is not a conversation at all. Its worse than talking in an empty room. You cannot hurt an empty room with mindless babble but other people don’t deserve to have their head filled up with crap they will never use and do not care about
Consider the case of talking with strangers. Are they interested in your family problems? Will it benefit them? How often do we start talking without considering if what we have to say is something of interest to the listener?
Inquiry is one of the best ways to initiate a good conversation, that is, if the question is of authentic importance to the one asking the question. Not drivel such as ”isn’t it hot today?”. Here is a question for consideration …. can talking about a story on TV or a movie ever be a good conversation? Spending ”real life” minutes talking about virtual reality seems like a waste of humanity to me.
People need to spend more time being quiet and listening. Not eager to get a word in edgewise to demonstrate their worth. Conversations where we compare ”mine vs yours” are about self indulgence, not anything ”good”.
Silence can be very good but few people can cope with it and feel compelled to fill the air with their voice.
Imagine a world where people only spoke if they have something important to say…
Imagine a world where all conversations we purposeful…